Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself!

I am often asked about the act of forgiving; just how does one forgive and move on?

I strongly agree with the article in my previous post. Inadequate skills are taught on how to forgive.

The ability to forgive needs to come from the heart and when your heart hurts, it makes it very difficult to take that first step!

I have created a tapping script to help those that need to take that first baby step.
Please fill in the blanks with the name or names of those that have taken control of your life by holding you hostage via your thoughts and memories.

As you are tapping, make sure you have a paper and pencil handy to write down any other thoughts or feelings that come up.

You may need to tap on those memories that surface, and get specific about the event/s that still haunt you.
Releasing those thoughts can be freeing, giving you a whole new lease on life

Give it a try, it can't hurt!

If you are new to this blog and unfamiliar with the tapping process, please see the "introduction to tapping" link at the top of this page. It will provide you with everything you need to know!

Karate chop point:

"Even though I am still so hurt and angry, I love and accept myself anyway”
"Even though I can’t let go, I accept these feelings and everything they mean to me ”
"Even though I don’t think I can ever move beyond this, I am a good person anyway”

Round One:

EB: All this anger
SE: All this hurt
UE: I keep replaying that horrible event – over and over
UN: Like a bad movie that never ends
CH: Sometimes my hurt and anger turns to tears
CB: All this tightness in my body
UA: I hate being a prisoner of my thoughts
HD: I don’t like feeling this way
WR: I just don’t know how to let go!

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the second round of tapping**

Round Two:

EB: I’m afraid if I forgive, I am letting _____ “off the hook”
SE: I know all of these feelings are not good for my body
UE: I might consider turning this around
UN: I need to do this for ME, not for ____
CH: I am the one paying the price, not ____
CB: Enough is enough; I am turning this around today!
UA: I refuse to let _____ have control over me and my body
HD: I am ready to let go
WR: Let’s get started!

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the third round of tapping**

Round Three:

EB: I will start by forgiving myself and anyone else that may have contributed to this situation
SE: I can’t change the past, I have to move forward
UE: I am grateful for my new attitude
UN: My body is starting to feel lighter
CH: It feels good thinking about regaining control of my life
CB: I choose to be free of this hurt
UA: I choose to let go for good
HD: The gray cloud is lifting
WR: The sun is starting to shine in my heart once again!

Take a deep breath and repeat as often as necessary until the emotional charge has been eliminated


Tapping Tip:

If you need to free any emotions that hold resentment, tap on the inside of the index finger where the nail bed meets the finger.

Tapping on this meridian helps release feelings of guilt, past hurts and for those that are having a hard time of letting go.

Focus on the thought that is haunting you, tap the index finger and feel the negative emotions melt away.

Lack of Forgiveness Can Affect Our Health


I read the following article by Sheryl Walters several years ago and it was an "ah ha" moment for me. I have referred back to it many times for guidance that has consistently kept my emotions in check.

I always thought that forgiving someone meant "letting them off the hook".
What I learned was that forgiveness was not about the person who hurt me, it was about ME! It was about giving myself a gift - yes....a gift!

That priceless gift was one of better health, both physically and emotionally.

Everyone knows that being angry feels terrible. When we feel angry at someone, we get a tight feeling in our chest and body, and our minds aren't free. Feeling angry at someone who cuts you off when you are driving is bad enough. Long term, chronic anger can ruin peoples' lives. Feeling angry for something that happened in childhood can literally make people prisoners of their own emotions.

Dr. Luskin of Stanford University is studying how forgiveness can help people become healthy. The 150 volunteers who have taken part in the Stanford Forgiveness Project say that letting go of the hurt caused by other people or by forces they see as being outside themselves, is not just one of the greatest emotional releases; they feel better physically, as well.

"Getting angry and needing to forgive are universal phenomena, but the skills to forgive are inadequately taught."

Holding on to anger for too long can obviously affect a person's emotional health. But hanging on to that anger, Dr. Luskin says, can also seriously affect people's physical health.

How is the Body Affected?

Lack of forgiveness, which often occurs as a result of having been hurt, humiliated, angered, or having suffered fear or loss, feelings of guilt, or envy, can have profound effects on the way your body functions.

Physically the body is in a state of stress. Muscles tighten, causing imbalances or pain in the neck, back and limbs. Blood flow to the joints is restricted, making it more difficult for the blood to remove wastes from the tissues and reducing the supply of oxygen and nutrients to the cells. Normal processes of repair and recovery from injury or arthritis are impaired. Clenching of the jaws contributes to problems with teeth and jaw joints. Headaches can become a problem. Chronic pain may get worse.

Blood flow to the heart is constricted. Digestion is impaired. Breathing may become more difficult. Anger can seriously impair the immune system, increasing the risk of infections and illness.

Luskin cites several studies that show how anger can affect the cardiovascular system by adding to a person's general level of stress. Other studies have indicated that patients who have had heart attacks have been able to improve their physical health by practicing forgiveness and working to feel more tolerant and less angry.

Additionally, Dr. Luskin says, when the body releases certain enzymes during anger and stress, cholesterol and blood pressure levels go up, not a good long-term position to put the body in. Forgiveness has been shown to lower blood pressure naturally. The bottom line, we can eat healthy and take care of ourselves on a physical level, but if our hearts are filled with anger, our bodies are not in optimum health.

This article can be found at:
http://www.naturalnews.com/023304_forgiveness_body_health.html

Sleep is like the unicorn.....

I have been accused by many who know me that I could fall asleep standing up or at least within 5 to 10 minutes of sitting down.

Sadly, this is very true!

I have always taken sleep for granted because it has never been a problem for me.

For others, falling asleep can be a challenge and one that can create anxiety as the clock ticks ever so annoyingly nearby.

When you lack sleep, it is very easy to get caught up in worries about the future. Your mind races and doesn’t want to let go.

On a more serious note, studies have shown that lack of sleep can increase the risk for a variety of major illnesses. It can increase stress hormones and drive up blood pressure which can lead to heart attacks and strokes.

People who lack of sleep can develop problems regulating their blood sugar, which may put them at increased risk for diabetes.

So…..what can you do?

What can you do when you are lying wide awake in your bed listening to all the voices in your head?

You can get present in your thoughts. Being in the “now” can quiet those voices.

Try tapping before you go to bed so that your body can slow down and relax. Once you get into bed, you can continue to physically tap or if that in itself keeps you awake, you can mentally tap picturing the acupressure points in your mind.

If you are unfamiliar with the tapping process, please see the "introduction to tapping" link at the top of this page. It will provide you with everything you need to know!

Karate chop point:

"Even though I’m tired and want to sleep, I love and accept myself anyway”
"Even though I am filled with anxiety about ___, I choose to be calm, confident and relaxed ”
"Even though I'm scared that I won't get enough sleep, I choose to feel so relaxed and peaceful that it won't make any difference”

Round One:

EB: my eyes are wide open
SE: I can’t get to sleep
UE: My mind is racing
UN: So many voices in my head
CH: The clock is reminding me that I am running out of time
CB: I’m so afraid I won’t get enough sleep
UA: So tired
HD: So frustrated
WR: My body just won’t let go

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the second round of tapping**

Round Two:

EB: I am all alone with my thoughts
SE: Thoughts that make me feel anxious and tense
UE: I am open to releasing some of this tension
UN: I don’t want to worry any more
CH: I know my thinking could be more productive after a good night’s sleep
CB: I choose to let my body know it is ok to relax
UA: It is ok to let my guard down for a little while
HD: It really is safe to go to sleep
WR: I forgive myself and anyone else that may have caused my insomnia

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the third round of tapping**

Round Three:

EB: I may be worrying unnecessarily
SE: What if my biggest worries never happen
UE: I will have lost sleep for nothing
UN: I am willing to put those thoughts out of my mind for a minute or two
CH: I welcome a peaceful sleep
CB: I choose to be pleasantly drowsy
UA: I can feel my body relaxing and letting go
HD: I lovingly release this day and slip into a peaceful sleep
WR: Good night, sleep tight........"yawn"

Take another deep breath and remember that everything will be alright!

Pain, pain, go away!


Migraines! The word alone makes your head hurt……..

I work in a hospital where many employees suffer from these debilitating headaches. Many call in sick but those that do come in, are miserable.
Some have to leave their shift early so they can be in complete darkness at home, coupled with taking strong medications.
These medications are the only way they can tolerate the pain, but leave them unable to function for hours at a time.

Work, family and social lives suffer until the pain subsides.

Medically, we know that the body physically expands and contracts the blood flow to the brain, inducing pain. There are many other things that can also trigger a migraine like allergies, diet, lack of water and sleep, hormonal imbalance etc.

It may come as a surprise to many, that migraines could have an emotional connection. Until an emotional cause is discovered and eliminated, the pain will probably continue.

The most common emotional triggers of migraines are anxiety, anger, stress, guilt and fear.

First we must look at your thoughts and feelings. Are they mostly positive or negative? What is being replayed over and over in your mind? What is being rehashed? Are you having a hard time letting go of something?

The location of the pain could also be a clue. The back of the head may represent the past. The top may represent the present and the front may represent the future.

Here are some questions that can help uncover emotional cause:
  • What event/s do you wish had not happened in your life?
  • What was going on in your life when the migraines first started?
  • Who or what are you most angry with?
  • What is the pain keeping you safe from?
  • Put these 3 negative emotions in order as they apply to you: __fear __guilt __anger
Those are great questions to get started on the journey to a pain free existence!

What would your life look like if you could manage the pain or be completely pain free?

Meridian tapping has had a strong history of reducing and eliminating migraine pain and the medications that go along with them.

I highly encourage you to incorporate the following tapping script in your quest to overcome migraines.

You may be very pleasantly surprised at the results once you tap away the emotional connection to your pain!

If this is your first exposure to tapping, please see the "introduction to tapping" link at the top of this page. It will provide you with everything you need to know to use the tapping script below.

Your situation is very personal, so first tap on the words I provided and change anything that comes up for you. Be descriptive about your pain and its location.

You will be amazed at what your mind will uncover as you start tapping. You may have memories surface that you had pushed deep down and forgotten. But….they were still there, playing subconsciously in the background without you knowing. Pay very close attention to what comes up!

Don’t forget to rate your pain before you start tapping and after the 3 rounds

Karate chop point:

"Even though I have this migraine headache in my right eye and temple, I love and accept my body anyway”

"Even though I can hardly function right now, I promise to pay attention to the message my body is sending me in my pain”

"Even though I feel absolutely horrible, I deeply and completely accept myself without judgment”

Round One:

EB: This awful migraine
SE: The throbbing pain in my eye
UE: I am so worried this won’t go way or it will get worse
UN: I’m so afraid I may have to leave work
CH: I’m so tired of all this pain
CB: All this nausea
UA: I don’t want to take those awful meds again
HD: But I don’t know how I can function without them
WR: This pain is horrible!

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the second round of tapping**

Round Two:

EB: I don’t know what is causing this pain
SE: I am open to the possibility that it is all emotional
UE: There is no way this awful pain could be tied to my thoughts and feelings
UN: But what if it is?
CH: Could it really be that easy?
CB: What if I had control all along and didn’t know it?
UA: I am ready to start feeling better
HD: I have suffered long enough
WR: I don’t need or want these headaches anymore!

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the third round of tapping**

Round Three:

EB: I am ready to kick this pain to the curb
SE: I will start by forgiving myself and anyone else that may have contributed to this pain
UE: I choose to release any emotional or physical ties to this ongoing pain
UN: I have never given myself the loving attention I deserve, but that is going to change today
CH: I am taking control of my life
CB: I choose to chill and relax
UA: I deserve to feel healthy
HD: I can now end my day feeling healthy and whole
WR: I am so proud of myself for turning this around – I have a whole new lease on life now!

Take another deep breath and see if your pain has come down in intensity or moved to another area of your body

Remember to be persistent. Repeat as many times as necessary until the pain subsides

This script is just a start. If the pain does not subside, you must tap on the specifics of any emotional issues that present themselves, including the feelings that arise – guilt, anger, jealousy, etc.

I would be very interested in your results and would love to hear from you. Please comment below or send me an email: cks1025@wcoil.com

I will see you again on Rainbow Bridge...

My dear friend Michelle, lost her precious dog Nala yesterday.
Nala's death left a hole in her family's heart!

For many families, pets earn the title of "fur children" or "fur babies". They fill a part of our heart that no one can - they make our lives whole.

They speak a language through their eyes that only we as owners understand. They love us more than we love ourselves.

They become our best friends, loving us unconditionally, protecting us and giving us endless hours of companionship. Some of us love our pets more than we like people!

When we suddenly find ourselves without our beloved companion, our world falls apart and the grief we feel is indescribable.

I have lost many pets over the years, but most recently, I lost 2 cats in 3 months.
It took several days to stop crying and many weeks getting used to not hearing their collar bells ring as they scampered through the house.

To get through those very difficult days, I relied on meridian tapping to help neutralize the emotional sting of my loss. It help me to face the empty collars, their absence at the door when I came home and the empty food bowls, without crying like a baby.

If you or someone you love is suffering right now, please try the following tapping script and keep using it until you feel better.

It won't make you forget your pet, it will help you function during the intial days of your loss.
It will "calm your inner pet grief storm"

If you are unfamiliar with tapping, please see the "introduction to tapping" link at the top of this page. It will provide you with everything you need to know!

Please substitute your pets name where applicable and change any words that fit your current situation - make it your own.

Karate chop point:

"Even though I can't stop crying, I love and accept myself anyway”
"Even though it so hard to imagine life without Nala, I love who I am, despite feeling this way”
"Even though I don't know how I can face tomorrow without her, I accept these feelings and everything they mean to me”

Round One:

EB: All this Nala grief
SE: I can't stop crying
UE: She was my best friend
UN: She was always there for me
CH: She loved me no matter what mood I was in
CB: All this sadness
UA: There will never be another Nala
HD: She was so full of life
WR: I miss her so much

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the second round of tapping**

Round Two:

EB: These feelings are so heavy
SE: I want to find a way to stop crying
UE: I need to be able to function
UN: I am doing the best I can right now
CH: I choose to remember the good times with Nala
CB: I know she is in a better place
UA: She doesn't hurt any more
HD: I am open to the possibility that I can find a way to move forward
WR: I know each day will get a little easier

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the third round of tapping**

Round Three:

EB: I remember that time when Nala made me laugh
SE: She made me laugh a lot
UE: She loved to play with _______
UN: I have many fond memories of her
CH: I choose to remember the good times
CB: I know she is around me right now
UA: I can feel her presence
HD: She is still protecting me
WR: I look forward to the day when we can cross Rainbow Bridge together!

Take another deep breath and remember that everything will be alright!

If you are unfamilar with the Rainbow Bridge poem please visit:
www.rainbowsbridge.com/poem.htm


Tapping Tip:


Tapping on the inside of the middle finger helps sadness, grief and sorrow.


If you feel yourself start to get upset, tap the inside of the middle finger at the base of the fingernail as you focus on your beloved pet..


Everybody has problems...

When I saw this picture the quote prompted me to revisit challenging times in my past.

There were times in my life when I reached crossroads and didn't know which path to follow. Many times I just wanted to sit down, right then and there, give up and fall asleep hoping that all my problems would be solved when I woke up.

I always had an inner voice that kept pushing me forward through those challenging times. Whether the outcomes were good or bad, I was satisfied that I did what I could do at that given time in my life and the choices felt right for me.

I've had people ask me, "so how do I get through this situation, how do I find the strength to go on? How did YOU do it?"

I never had the perfect answer for everyone because each situation is as unique as are the people involved.

But if you are struggling right now and feel like giving up, I challenge you to use the following tapping script. It will calm your nerves, give you a sense of peace and allow you to step back and breathe. Don't be surprised if your conscious offers you a different perspective, one that you never thought of before today.

If nothing else, it will take the emotional zing out of your current situation which in itself gives you more clarity.

If you are unfamiliar with tapping, please see the "introduction to tapping" link at the top of this page. It will provide you with everything you need to know!

Karate chop point:

"Even though I want to give up right now, I love and accept myself anyway”
"Even though it so hard to imagine moving forward, I love who I am, despite feeling this way”
"Even though I don't know what the answers are, I accept these feelings and everything they mean to me”

Round One:

EB: I don't know what to do
SE: I need some answers
UE: It all seems hopeless right now
UN: I don't think things will ever get any better
CH: I just want to give up
CB: I don't have any more to give
UA: I feel weak
HD: I feel defeated
WR: How do I go on?

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the second round of tapping**

Round Two:

EB: These feelings of hopelessness are too heavy to carry around any more
SE: I really want to find a way to over come this situation
UE: I am open to a creative solution
UN: I ready to set my mind at ease
CH: I choose to imagine this situation resolving itself
CB: I am willing to give anything a try
UA: What if this silly tapping does give me some clarity?!
HD: I choose to relax and let the ideas flow
WR: I am mentally ready for things to fall into place

** Now take a deep breath or two and proceed to the third round of tapping**

Round Three:

EB: I can feel it starting to fall into place
SE: Like the fog evaporating in the sun’s rays, my confusion is starting to evaporate as well
UE: It’s becoming clearer
UN: Have I been holding the answers inside all along?
CH: All I needed to do was to follow my instincts and intuition
CB: I am so grateful I am learning to trust myself
UA: I deserve to be happy!!
HD: Mirror mirror on the wall
WR: I held all the answers after all!

Take another deep breath and remember that everything will be alright!

Tapping tip:

Tapping the karate chop point helps with indecisiveness and a cluttered thought process.
It stabilizes the ability to make decisions!

Make peace with where YOU are!


I was having a discussion about church and religion recently when the conversation surprisingly pushed a button.

I very rarely get too riled about anything, especially religion, but this conversation hit a nerve
.

The matter at hand was touchy because a family member had been attending a church which was not of the same denomination in which they were raised. Apparently, this ruffled some feathers in the family and they questioned the company this family member was keeping.

The problem was not that they weren't going to church, it was that they were not going to the RIGHT church!


I couldn't believe what I was hearing....and it took me back about 30 years. I had been raised a Catholic but had attended a Baptist church as a visitor that particular Sunday many decades ago.

During the sermon, the preacher said, "Do you know what I would be if I wasn't Baptist? I'd be ashamed!".
I was so insulted, I didn't hear another word he said for the remainder of the sermon! How dare this "man of the cloth" make such an arrogant statement?
I thought church was a place you went to learn, to feel safe, to feel inspired.
I sure didn't feel that way when I left and I never went back!

I have never forgotten that one sentence and it has had a big influence on me in regards to tolerance and respect for others about their religious decisions.

It feels very uncomfortable when you stand in a place of "I'm right and you're wrong".
When anyone speaks from ego, they cut themselves off from the very happiness they seek.


There is no right religion, there are many religions and the differences in those religions is what makes life so beautiful!

Religion is very personal and sacred. It isn't about how often you go to church or what church you attend, what matters is how you treat people when you aren't there.
It's about how you make people feel, how you make them smile, not how long you sit in a pew.

I heard someone once say, "Standing inside a garage doesn't make you any more a car, than sitting in a church makes you any more a christian".
I agree - Being kind to people and showing respect is a great place to start!

We need to make peace with where we are and make peace with where our friends and family are.

If your thoughts feel good to you, then you are aligned with your true self - you are an extension of a higher power and pure positive energy.
That is the point in which you are full of love and joy which then manifests into more experiences of true happiness!

What if we could step back into our own power, allow people to be, think and feel for themselves without absorbing that into our experience?

What a wonderful world it would be!